The Atlanta Dream led by Angel Reese...

I had Internet problems as we are on a WiFi hub in our temporary housing, so I couldn't log on when I was in the most pain, but I'm actually doing better.

I was actually in crisis mode on Monday so I remembered what my therapist previously said, which was call the office, don't wait until the next appointment but just call the office if I feel in a crisis.

The championship game was late Saturday.

I was inconsolable.

Had to wait til Monday.

I called the therapy office Monday and amazingly they had a cancellation and thus an appointment a few hours later.

The rough thing is, I don't leave every therapy appointment feeling better because there are no concrete solutions, just coping and time and all that.

Processing and just so much 

Thankfully after such a frustrating and sad session he mentioned that it is fear...the cruel, hateful people are acting out of fear regarding their own sense of inferiority, insecurity and so on.

That fear angle didn't bring me relief years ago when he first mentioned it but I have done a tremendous amount of work....think like earning a college degree...

(Tons of classes, lectures, tests, information overload basically. All types of skills to learn, things to memorize and techniques to practice and so on.)

That's what healing is like.

Constantly Learning. Living. Like any other part of life. 

So now when I hear that fear is a factor in horrible people acting horribly, it helps my mind to free up any need to fight back...

because it helps me understand that the deficit, the defect is with them and has nothing to do with me. And the beautiful Atlanta Dream women

Just wish the Internet and social media was never invented so these fools and their fear could stay out my face.

Even though I don't even read what they say anymore, I removed all that from my life. No googling or anything.

But I told my therapist just like we know a hurricane has wind and rain I know what these little Internet bastards were going to be saying 

Anyway I'm thankfully much better now, out of crisis mode.

Still a long long journey