Note: There are thousands & thousands of different religious practices and beliefs in Africa. For the purpose of shorter titles, I’m using the broad term “Africa.” However, I much rather say “Motherland” and such. Examples of African spiritual terms include: Yoruba, Orishas, Ifa, Dogon are just some spiritual terms that I can remember off the top of my head. I have a long way to go, lol. Whenever I specify anything regarding Europeans, I will certainly be respectful and specify exact cultures when it comes to Africa. I will never belittle anything related to my heritage.
Part 2 of 2. Part 1 can be found here
(The spirit of slavery is still here)
My therapist said I was an old soul, I said more like a slave ship soul. LOL he started laughing. I make jokes a lot.
I swear it’s some kind of connection here. I said in certain places to this day, the smell of the blood, feces, and decay from slaves can still be smelled as they were locked in dungeons (slave castles) before they were placed on the ships.
These were also predominately children because they murdered anyone who was strong enough to fight back and anyone who resisted.
This is not history that was long ago. The stench of their blood is literally still there if you go in parts of West Africa where the ships docked. How is it even possible to think there won’t be people like me….who are inexplicably connected to, affected by, traumatized by something that is literally in my own DNA?
And in order for the trauma to end, I have to believe in something that makes a lot of sense to me.
I’m in a much better place now, but I cried so hard in my December session when I went back through my beloved childhood pet deaths and realized I had not made peace because my introduction to religion was so brutal and terrifying, it never sat right in my spirit.
Well that makes complete sense when I remember how the introduction of religion was brutal, deadly by the millions to my ancestors. Slaves used to be free people and had their own extensive religious beliefs and they did not believe in Allah nor Jesus. Along with Judaism these are called Abrahamic religions.
My ancestors were normal people and they did not worship demons, as the slave masters have us to believe. They were not demonic. Even my own dumb a** self didn’t understand this at one point & thought African religions were scary.
Far from it. Full of many beautiful women, dark skin, beautiful goddesses.
—————-
Their choices were: convert to Islam (around 700 years after the Crucifixion the light skin Arabs conquered darker skin West Africa as they had already conquered brown skin North Africa centuries earlier) or Christianity (the white Christians came to West Africa around the 1500s) and live as our dark skin slaves but get your reward when you die and go to heaven, or reject us and you die now.
That’s what happened. Skin color should not matter in religion but it absolutely does. The suffering itself is not the problem, for me, it’s how can hundreds of millions be made to suffer more simply because of how they are born. If we’re all born in sin, then we should all suffer based on sin and not skin color.
Skin color became the sin, since we talking hundreds of millions of people wiped off the Earth based on skin color. That’s not something I can ignore or make peace with even if they went to heaven.
(Silver lining)
As painful as it is, at least it makes sense why as a little girl, especially being a dark skin child, I rarely felt peace and comfort or included with religious teachings.
Now as I got older, I could rationalize and memorize Biblical teachings and scriptures that would bring me comfort as an adult because I wanted it to. I needed it to. I made it apply to me.
But a child’s spirit does not lie. And that spirit is not broken nor controlled…yet
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I love silver linings…
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