It's just a feeling that hits me when I'm walking in my home, getting ready to do whatever, and a sense of relief will come across my mind and I'll feel like "I Love My Life."
This mostly came from a sense of feeling like thanks to my husband's amazing talents and some good luck, we are finally financially okay! could be much better of course, but since my husband got his well-paying job in 2019, we got a cute little older small home in 2020, we were able to afford groceries, afford the bills etc (though we still have to work on getting other house repairs done, the monthly bills are okay) because we've spent many years where month to month it would be a struggle to pay the bills.
So while yes of course, through the years, I didn't hate my life but I did hate the financial problems, of course, I mean your sense of survival is at stake.
So of course, I've always been immensely grateful for my gifts of being a mom, wife, sister, daughter & enjoying other things in my life. Financial struggles take a huge toll though, so that's probably why I didn't have the "I love my life" thought start crossing my mind until we were able to get all the bills paid on time and while having money left over to eat, put gas in the car etc
Once we got financially better off, I wasn't like feeling like "I love my life" every day of course. It would just be a pleasant feeling that would hit me every now and then.
Though our finances remained okay, it had become exceedingly more difficult for me to just make through each day, because of the state of the world....no need to list everything because then I'd never stop typing. Just everything going on and magnified and with all the protecting and organizing, no signs of change happening.
So everything really started crashing more the end of 2023 and through this year of course, all of the heartbreak from the way people in this world are
A journey, I guess I should look at it like walking through the woods or something. It's not a straight path, there are no directions, and in fact sometimes I'm straight up lost in the woods.
(Okay, I love nature so I'm not meaning to use "woods" in a negative sense. The woods are beautiful! But hey, it's the natural home for other wildlife, not for me lol. I'm just a visitor.)
But anyway, just in the past few days though, I'm back in a comfortable part of this journey, where I can be just walking through my house and have that sense of loving my life again. This means I am definitely closing some personal trauma wounds which helps my brain have a barrier against hateful people deepening my wounds
There's a lot more to love about your life when you're able to break through some chains
😀🦋🦋
