Continued from this post where I'm talking about the concert:
Ronnie, Bobby, Ricky, Mike, Ralph, Johnny

My last sentence states:
"I felt something go away. I felt some type of release" 

---

All of the emotions I felt during those minutes can be explained like this:

🌷Seeing young, beautiful and healthy Bobby Brown on the screen versus
seeing that he didn't look like the same guy at all. He was in good spirits though

🌷Glancing from the screen which sent me back in time to glancing at the real stage in current time

🌷Knowing they, my favorite famous gentlemen in the world, were all on stage together after all these years, still as brothers

🌷Thinking of being that 9 year-old girl at the concert with my dad, the first gentlemen in my life

🌷Thinking of how I was sitting next to my husband, my gentlemen, my first love, who knew about every step of my healing journey and why this concert meant way more to me than imaginable 

🌷Then I started thinking of, imagining, or more like feeling like that young girl who used to look at the exact same Booby Brown  Every Little Step I Take music video

🌷I was remembering loving the music, seeing how beautiful the women were but feeling uncomfortable and not wanting to see them on screen;
loving his dancing, loving the way he looked...his hair, outfit and face, but feeling so sad and lost for myself

🌷Remebering how I had always defined my life as going from one of the happiest little girls in the world, to a lost girl not even wanting to be in the world

🌷And then, all of my focus just went straight to that adolescent girl who had been lost and confused for so long, decades

🌷And I felt this for her: "You're okay now. You're safe. We have the answers of why you became so sad for so long. Now that we got the answers, I can comfort you now. I can hug you now. You can be free from the pain now.
And
I 
Love
You
Again 

🌷So I'm definitely bawling by this time, hand over my mouth type of crying, I mean, I was crying hard and it felt relieving, it felt renewing. 
Of course, there was some sadness in those tears, I'd say maybe 5% lol, if I just had to put a number on it

🌷Current day me is fine. Adolescent me needed to be comforted and loved my current me

‼️This healing moment was due to nearly 3 years of trauma therapy and lots of personal work outside of therapy. So it seems like an inspirational movie now with all these coincidences, but I want to be clear that the reality is it took 3 years of the right trauma therapist, plus, I had always been working on myself for decades trying to figure out what happened to me and why I became so sad as a preteen.

Yes, I've been working on these answers for a very long time

‼️The Candy Girl New Edition Way 2026 Concert did not create the healing, that only happens in movies. Don't be confused, healing is hurtful, messy and exhausting, and I still would never say the journey is complete.

But I will say, this has been an amazing experience on this journey; with so many cool coincidences I ain't gonna lie it feels magical!
I'm so deserving of all of these fairytale type of coincidences 
I accept it all!

Finally,
🌷I had always kept adolescent me separate from childhood me, and during this amazing emotional experience when I was overcome with so many emotions, I felt a combining, a merge, of happy childhood me with adolescent me.
I no longer had to leave adolescent me as so alone
I have come far enough on my healing journey to merge her with the rest of my life, rather than keeping her isolated and separate
She's a part of my identity, and she no longer has to be suffocated by the pain anymore
But can be viewed through any other good things that she was experiencing during those times

New Edition was always there.